Impostor syndrome is defined as ‘high-achieving individuals with the inability to internalise their accomplishments and the persistent fear of being exposed as a fraud.’ Whether it’s getting promoted at work, receiving compliments for our achievements or dating someone we feel is a little out of our league, feeling like we aren’t deserving of something good has happened to the best of us.
This isn’t a bad thing necessarily. Everyone needs a healthy dose of scepticism and self-doubt. It’s what keeps us humble and prevents us from being overconfident. But if you find yourself doubting yourself too much, that could be a problem. So here are some tips to help you beat impostor syndrome and reach your goals with full confidence.
1. List Your Accomplishments
One way to kill impostor syndrome is to actually know what you’ve done. It helps to take stock of victories – big or small – because this way, you have a record of how much you’ve progressed.
In my earlier years, I would often find myself not knowing how much I was worth, and I was always just guessing. But when I took a good look at the things I’d already achieved, it was easier for me to demand things closer to my worth.
Part of this involved listening to the people around me who were generous enough to give their honest and candid opinions. It’s through accepting the criticism and praise of trusted people that I knew what I was genuinely providing other people.
2. Shift Your Self-Perception
When you choose to be more self-aware – that includes recognising your abilities and strengths – you’ll learn to love yourself more. This will make it easier for you to both understand and communicate your value.
In my first job, I always used to bite off more than I can chew. My boss would give me tasks, and I would always say yes out of fear that if I said no, I would show I wasn’t good enough. The truth is, if I were just honest about my capabilities, I wouldn’t have felt like an impostor.
You need to realise that rarely do people expect you to be the best at what you do. Instead, most people expect you to provide what you advertise. So if you’re honest, there shouldn’t be any reason for you to question whether you can provide something or not.
One helpful tip when it comes to saying no to things you can’t do is to reframe your mindset from “I can’t do it” to “I can’t do this as of now.” Thinking this way allows you to be more forgiving of yourself and gives you the space to learn.
Don’t beat yourself up over things that you might be lacking in. Instead, see these as opportunities to learn and expand. Your strengths are in no way diminished by the things you’ve yet to conquer. Once you start appreciating your talents, you’ll be able to better own your potential.
3. Focus On Giving
At my first speaking engagement, I was so worried that I wasn’t cut out for it. I was afraid that the moment I stepped on stage, people would think that I wasn’t credible enough to be speaking to them. So I asked one of my friends working in radio and public speaking to tell me what he thought. He told me, “The more you think about what others think, the less you care about what you’re giving others.”
That struck me because it was true. I wasn’t thinking of what I could offer other people, or how I could provide them with value. Instead, I was focused on me and making myself look good.
When you’re in a situation like this, remember that your goal in doing anything is to provide service to others. Focus on your output, and whether it’s benefitting people or not. This way, your attention will be less on yourself and more on the things you do and give.
To your success,
Mario
[Visit www.mariosingh.com now to enjoy a FREE e-book of my latest “37 Essential Principles for Massive Success” when you subscribe!]
