There are many who aspire to be a leader who gets everything done. The truth, however, is that this simply isn’t possible.
Now if you’re reading this, I’m guessing that whatever stage you’re at in your career, you probably want to do so many things. If you’re young, you don’t want to waste the time you have now. If you’re older, you don’t want to waste the time you have left. And honestly, that’s something very admirable.
But the fact remains that nobody has more than 168 hours every week and trying to pack your to-do list with things that you could actually forgo, means shortchanging yourself of valuable resources that could be focused on responsibilities that actually matter. Hence, it’s important to say no to things – it makes sure you don’t end up with too much on your plate and lets you save your yes-es for the really important things. You’ll find that no is an essential word in the vocabulary of leadership. And in this article, I’m going to explain why.
1. Learn to Respect Yourself and Your Needs
Saying no is essential to self-respect. Any person with self-confidence and who loves themselves feels no guilt in declining an invitation, turning down a request or passing up an offer. They’re aware of the boundaries that should be set and minimise occasions where the priorities of others take precedence over their own. People who respect themselves understand that while giving their best effort at work is necessary, there is more to life than that – health, leisure, and relationships are just as important.
In fact, it’s possible that doing too many things actually harms your career. Mark Zuckerberg wouldn’t be the person he is today if he hadn’t dedicated his initial efforts to just Facebook. Of course, now that his empire has expanded, there’s more time to focus on other ventures such as Instagram and Oculus VR. But he couldn’t have built the foundations of his empire and given himself the space and time to achieve even more things without first focusing on his specialisations.
The confidence to say no allows you to put yourself and your dreams first, and not succumb to distractions. Learn to say no without fear or guilt and you’ll soon realise how much more time, energy and confidence you’ll be gifting yourself.
2. Reduce Over-reliance, Encourage Independence
Saying no also lets others learn to better appreciate their own capabilities and make their own decisions. This is especially true when you’re caught in the habit of acceding to requests for help in matters that could easily be done by the requester themselves. When you say no, you let others exercise their creativity, test their abilities and find solutions to problems on their own. It gives them the trust and the belief that they can handle their own things.
In effect, this stops people from being over-reliant. Anyone who’s ever had someone who clung onto them too much – whether it’s a family member or a significant other – knows just how hard it is to shake these people off. This is because they’ve already settled into a cycle where they can get whatever they want. The key is to end this cycle early.
This is also true for employees who tend to look to you for help a little too much, or take advantage of your leadership. It forces them to resolve issues independently, to look elsewhere for the right guidance where necessary and to become better on their own.
3. Develop Your Charisma
Lastly, saying no also helps you develop your charisma. This might sound weird because no isn’t the sexiest word in the dictionary, and yet, there may be no other two-letter word that can be as powerful as the no and the impact it creates on others. People love being told yes, and they love being affirmed. But this is exactly why being able to say no, truthfully and professionally, develops your charisma.
If you can say no to people and they don’t get upset, you’ve done something right. You’ve been able to clearly and honestly state your opinion and intentions, but you’ve also not gone about hurting someone’s feelings, nor burned any bridges.
Learning to say no well means being able to connect with other people so that when they hear your rejection, they don’t feel neglected, but instead, see someone who is able to carry their own weight.
To your success,
Mario
[Visit www.mariosingh.com now to enjoy a FREE e-book of my latest “37 Essential Principles for Massive Success” when you subscribe!]